How To Deal With Difficult People

Dealing with Difficult People: Strategies That Work

Difficult people are everywhere – family gatherings, workplaces, or social circles. Handling them skillfully can save your sanity and relationships. Let's break down how to deal with tough personalities in different contexts.

1. Relationship

Difficult people in relationships can be draining. Here's how to cope:

- Empathize & Communicate: Try to understand where they're coming from. Are they stressed, insecure, or overwhelmed? Talk openly about how their behavior affects you. Use "I" statements like "I feel hurt when..."

- Set Boundaries: Be clear about what you can and can't handle. Boundaries protect your mental space. For instance, Your Christmas prep is getting hectic, partner wants you to cook extra jollof for 20 people. Say "Abi, let's discuss finances and guest list first, okay? 

- Choose Battles: Not every fight is worth it. Focus on what matters for the relationship. For instance, Your in-laws complain on how you decorate the house. Skip arguing, just smile and say "Next time, I'll add more flowers 😊" and then walk away politely. 

2. Workplace

Dealing with tough coworkers or bosses? Here's how to navigate:

- Stay Professional: Keep emotions in check, stay focused on work. Don't let their mood dictate yours. For example: Boss is stressing about a project deadline. You arrive late due traffic. Say "Good morning, sorry I'm late. Traffic was crazy. I'll catch up ASAP."

- Address Issues Directly: Talk to them privately if needed. Be assertive (not aggressive) about issues affecting work. For example: a coworker took credit for your idea in a meeting. Pull them aside: "Hey, let's clarify who did the research on that client pitch."

- Document Interactions: Cover your back if issues escalate. Keep records of key interactions just for documentation purposes. You never know when they come in handy. 

3. Family

Family can be the most difficult. Here's how to manage in such a family:

- Pick Your Battles: Some issues aren't worth family drama. Let go of small things. For instance, Aunty asks at dinner, "When are you getting married?" Smile and deflect: "Aunty, food is too delicious, let me eat 😊."

- Show Empathy: Understand the family dynamics at play. Maybe they're stressed or dealing with stuff you don't know. Even if they're not understanding, sometimes, when all you have to give is love, sooner or later, you'll get the love back.

- Set Clear Expectations: Manage how you engage with them. Be clear about what you need. For instance, your cousin wants to borrow money. Say "Let's discuss what you need it for and when you'll pay back, okay?"

General Tips

- Stay Calm: Keep your cool, don't let anyone push your buttons. For example, someone cuts you off on the highway, just laugh it off, "Omo, not today 😅."

- Know When to Walk Away: Protect your energy. Not everyone is worth the fight.

Now that you know how to deal with difficult people, what if you're the difficult person? 🤣😉. Our next blog post will be addressing that. Stay tuned for it. 😊